How often, when we find ourselves in a transitional period of life, do we dread the space in between? You know, the places where we’re on the precipice of being somewhere but not quite there, looking to achieve the next thing but still trying to figure out how or when.

I’ve been reflecting on this space in between lately, and this quote and concept really resonated: 

“Music is the space between the notes.” - Claude Debussy

This quote reflects on how the musician connects from one note to the next and how that connection, that artistic decision between the notes, creates the feeling of the entire piece.

Here’s the elephant in the room: the majority of our lives are spent in the space in between. Most days are not filled with lifetime achievement milestones, even though that’s what we tend to focus on. And honestly, thank goodness for that. Can you imagine the intensity of a lifetime filled with big milestones, day after day?

This is one of the deeper reasons why time often feels as if it’s passing quickly, even if the days feel slow. We chase achievements and often try to escape the spaces in between them.

And yet, the space in between is where the magic happens.

The space in between is where the music is made.

Where you create the soundtrack of your life.

And I hope, instead of that sounding like a responsibility, a part of you allows yourself to view it as the gift it is. There is nothing outside of who you already are that you need to achieve in the space in between. The way you gift others with your presence, the beauty you put out in the world through your creations, the way you interact with a butterfly along your path or a bird in the garden—this is the space in between, this is where you are creating the music of your life. 

And may I be so bold to say, from an outsider’s perspective, what you’ve created so far is quite a masterpiece.

Below, I’ve explored the concept of the space in between through various lenses—from ancient wisdom to the role of negative space in art. My hope is that if you find yourself in a transitional phase of your life, you will discover a gem or two here that support you. For more actionable tips on navigating these in-between times, you may be interested in: 4 Ways to Honor Transitional Spaces.

Lessons from Carl Jung on Liminality

Both Arnold van Gennep and Victor Turner studied ancient tribal rituals, which had three stages: separation, liminality, and aggregation. These stages mirror transitions in our modern lives. In these rituals, the middle stage—liminality—is the longest and most transformative. It’s a phase where we leave our old identity but have yet to assume our new one. And much like the space between notes, this is where the music of our lives is truly created.

Carl Jung offers us a deeper perspective on liminality with his lifelong study of the human psyche. He saw the process of individuation—the journey to self-realization—as unfolding within this liminal space. We can imagine it as a sacred container. The liminal space is a protected, transformative vessel where the magic of breaking down and rebuilding happens. Here, we are free to discover, shed our old selves, and rebirth as something new entirely. It’s a space in which we learn to reconnect with the parts of us that are most true, away from the distractions of the roles and expectations of society. We tune into the subtle music of our souls, deciding more deliberately who we want to be and what we want to create.

Think about the times in your life when you’ve felt the most disoriented, the most lost. Looking back, we often see these times preceded great transformations. Just as meditations often call us to notice the space between words, the pause between the in-breath and out-breath, transitional periods are also a call to pause and bring more calm and clarity to our lives. Instead of trying to escape from this place, we can still ourselves within it and truly notice the wisdom this vessel contains.

Jung’s teachings tell us that these periods of uncertainty are not just gaps to be filled or rushed through, but rather, are essential for our personal growth. They are the cocoon stages in which we prepare to emerge as something new and more aligned with our true selves.

The Power of Negative Space in Art

This concept of empty space also resonates throughout the world of art and design. Understanding how artistic thinking can be applied to empty spaces in life can be enlightening and soothing.

Among many, Henri Matisse is one artist who often used negative space as a defining element in his paintings. He says, “Expression for me does not reside in passions glowing in a human face or manifested by violent movement. The entire arrangement of my picture is expressive; the place occupied by my figures, the empty space around them, the proportions, everything has its share.”

In art and design, negative space—or space where nothing exists—is vital to the entire work. Negative space or open space around an object is what helps define, gives shape, and provides focus on the subject. Empty space in design is not an absence; it’s an intentional decision that allows the subject to come into focus more clearly. Without this space, the main subject loses relevance and meaning. It becomes just another component of a chaotic background.

This principle can be applied to how we view our own life transitions. Just as an artist uses negative space to bring out the beauty and significance of the subject, we can use the empty spaces in our lives to bring out our true selves. By embracing the negative space in our lives, we allow ourselves the freedom to evolve and form the shape of our lives more intentionally.

Ancient Wisdom on Empty Space

As a final impression, Lao Tzu’s words also offer profound insight into the importance of empty space:

“Thirty spokes are joined in the wheel’s hub.
The hole in the middle makes it useful.
Mold clay into a bowl.
The empty space makes it useful.
Cut out doors and windows for the house.
The holes make it useful.
Therefore, the value comes from what is there,
But the use comes from what is not there.”
— Lao Tzu

In this passage, Lao Tzu highlights how empty spaces make things useful. In life, the spaces between provide opportunities to highlight and make room for purpose and service. The hub of a wheel, the interior of a bowl, and the doors and windows of a house all gain their usefulness by containing an empty space and allowing that space to be of service. These gaps are where potential lies and purpose is born.

Incorporating the wisdom of Jung, Matisse, and Lao Tzu, we can begin to learn how to appreciate the space in between. We understand that it’s not just the milestones that matter but the pauses, reflections, and transformations that happen in the stillness. Embracing these spaces can lead to deeper understanding, greater creativity, and a more profound connection with ourselves and the world around us.

References:

"Victor Turner and Anti-Structure." Encyclopaedia Britannica. https://www.britannica.com/topic/rite-of-passage/Victor-Turner-and-anti-structure

"On Liminal Space." Jungian Online, 2 Nov. 2015. https://www.jungianonline.com/articles/2015/11/2/on-liminal-space